As leaders, we often find ourselves in situations where tough conversations are necessary. Whether providing constructive feedback, addressing performance issues, or discussing sensitive topics, these moments can be challenging, especially when we fear the other person might react emotionally. How do we handle these conversations with the professionalism they require while remaining compassionate and real?
Prepare, But Stay Flexible
Preparation is key to any difficult conversation. Know what you need to say and have clear examples to illustrate your points. However, be prepared to deviate from your plan if the conversation takes an unexpected turn. Flexibility allows you to respond to the other person’s emotions at the moment rather than sticking rigidly to a script.
Embrace Your Empathy
It’s important to consider how other people might react to the conversation. Approach the discussion with kindness and respect, and remember that it’s okay to feel uncomfortable—this discomfort is a sign that you care about the impact of your words.
Create a Safe Space
Before diving into the conversation, set the stage for a safe and supportive environment. Choose a private setting where the person feels comfortable.
Use “I” Statements
Framing your points with “I” statements can help reduce defensiveness when discussing sensitive topics. Instead of saying, “You are not meeting expectations,” try, “I have noticed that we are not meeting our goals in this area, and I would like to understand how we can improve together.” This approach makes the conversation feel more collaborative and less accusatory.
Allow Space for Emotions
If the other person becomes emotional, give them the space to express their feelings. Allowing them to process their emotions can help de-escalate the situation. Be patient and offer support by saying things like, “I can see that this is difficult for you,” or “It’s okay to feel upset; let’s take a moment.”
Focus on Solutions
After addressing the issues, shift the focus towards finding solutions. Collaborate on actionable steps to improve the situation. This demonstrates your commitment to their development and empowers them to take ownership of the necessary changes.
Follow Up
Tough conversations don’t end when the meeting does. Follow up with the person to check on their progress and provide ongoing support. This reinforces your commitment to their growth and helps build a stronger, more trusting relationship.
Want to learn more?
At Slingshot25, we know that tough conversations are challenging for many professionals. That’s why we developed our Tough Conversations that Move People Forward Course. Contact us to talk more about how to attend this class.